Writings

just a little insight into what I think about.....

With You

in endless circles

round and around my mind turns

this should taste so sweet

but it doesn't

it burns

This is what I wanted

for it to be your turn to cry

for you to hurt like me

be lonely

but why

Why do I still feel

like I'm crying too

like because you hurt

I still hurt

with you

Hopeless Romantic

I walked home tonight
alone in the cold
and I wished to myself
for someone to hold

And I thought to myself
in the dark of the night
how in the world
can I keep up this fight?

For I long to hold her
pull her close for hours
to kiss her lips
to send her flowers

For her to curl up with me
feel her hair on my chin
when it's snowing outside
to lay in bed and stay in

And when the world is asleep
tucked away in their bed
we'll wander dark streets
and stay up instead

Stay up all night
fight to keep open our eyes
just so when the morning comes
we can see the sun rise

Take her to places
that she's never been
and build a glorious love
for us to be in

Because I'm a hopeless romantic
and I don't care who knows
though I should be careful
to who my heart shows

But I still sleep alone
with my love on the shelf
with no one to hold
I keep to myself

Someday I'll find someone
and that's the hope I keep
Sometimes that's the thought
that gets me to sleep

But until that day
I'll continue this fight
and I'll sleep by myself
on this cold winter night

With the hope that there's someone
who's heart beats with mine
to lay with at night
with arms to entwine

because I'm a hopeless romantic
but no one would know
because I haven't found that someone
for my heart to show

That Funny Feeling

You know that funny feeling you get

on a ride said to be crazy

at the fair when you begin to plummet

so fast it makes your sight hazy?

Not just in your stomach

not that's just the start

it's much more than that

it's in your brain, and in your heart

It's the wind in your hair

holding cold steel in your fingers

even after the ride stops

the feeling still lingers

It's like the excitement

that makes your heart jump

like too fast on back roads

at every twist, turn, and bump

Uninhibited ecstatic happiness

everything else goes away

all you think of is now

this instant, today

And a smile breaks your face

you don't even know why

unadulterated freedom

you'd swear you could fly

You take a deep breadth

and let out a scream

smile so wide

it could break at the seam...........

That's how you make me feel....

Thanks

Lonely Man's Greed

I don't want to spend this night alone

I want you to whisper goodnight in my ear

I want to hold your hand, and kiss your cheek

I want you to pull me near

I want you to wipe these tears from my eyes

I want you to tell me it's O.K.

I want you to tell me I don't have to cry

Because you are here to stay

I want to hug you when you're not expecting it

I want to kiss you while you dream

I want you to tell me you love me for no reason

I want to see your smile beam

I want to hear your heart beating

and know it beats for me

I want to tell you that I love you

and that will always be

I should be happy with what I have

And I know I shouldn't weep

But missing you right now

I have to cry myself to sleep

I want your love and your compassion

Your heart is what I need

I want to keep them for myself

This is my lonely greed

The Storm

What happened to yesterday's romance?

like seeing a girl thinking there's no chance

but she shoots you a corner of her eye, shy glance

so I walk up and ask for a slow dance

What happened to sending a girl flowers

staying awake and talking for hours

sacrificing my coat to protect her from spring showers

being broke knowing love was all that was ours

But love, hell that was all we would need

without an image to uphold, or an ego to feed

late nights spent in bed, to each other we'd concede

like a billboard on my chest, my heart you could read

But back in those days, we had nothing to fear

not hunger, not distance, or your future career

we were too old to listen or too young to hear

the water churning and thunder rumbling in our ear

Because a storm was brewing and we didn't even know

or we chose to ignore it and just let it go

but the thunder kept rumbling, and the wind it did blow

and the storm didn't slow, but continued to grow

Now the wind picked you up and took you from me

and the clouds are so thick, that your eyes I can't see

Heavy rains soak my face, don't know where you could be

and I'm left searching for you, where the land's turned to sea

Now I'm lost and I'm drowning in the middle of nowhere

struggling and flailing and gasping for air

kept alive by your memories, the smell of your hair

but I don't know where you are, or if you even still care

But I keep treading water, for what better choice?

I long for your skin, and the sound of your voice

hopes to one day reunite, rekindle, rejoice

live the high life, drink wine, and drive in a Royce

because when I am with you, I live in a dream

everything feels so warm, or so it would seem

so together an item, a unit, a team

dark red love running through my bloodstream

Now it rips me apart, because you're not around

my pen and my page are the solace I've found

when I'm alone at night, without even a sound

solitude the ropes by which I feel forever bound

Because love's no longer enough for us to pull through

and it's hard to still love me when you've every reason not to

and that kills me inside, cuz I know I still love you

but lately you've been slow to say you love me too

and I have no idea what I'm gonna do

because I never remember ever feeling this blue

The Mist

No taxation without representation

so we broke away

to own men on a plantation

hypocritical indoctrination

a so called free-formed organization

except for the black slave population

where, all men are created equal

but did that mean women weren't really people?

cuz there was an empty kitchen that they had to keep full?

and those voting levers, shit they would never need pull

But the underground railroad slaves began to sneak through

and at the other end they began to fight true

because America wasn't only white, but red and bright blue

and tied down women began to fight too

they were not gonna stand there and take that from you

they fought for themselves and they fought for their rights

they fought in the days, and they fought in the nights

they fought for everything, you couldn't count all the fights

now homosexuals fight for the right to marry

Pro-choicers fight because babies are scary

while religious nuts fight to force them to carry

but the more that we fight

the more bodies we bury

so call me a coward because I'm pacifist

unpatriotic because I won't smash a fist

so be it then, I refuse to stand for this

we have enough problems at home that lurk in the mist

Peace

the flame

came

to tame

my lame

shame

in the same

frame

of time

to rhyme

in the light lime

and mime

my feelings

and wheelings

and dealings

while I'm kneeling

liquid heart congealing

rising up to the ceiling

healing

my scars

from old wars

that I fought

never sought

cuz I thought

I was never cool

in school

just a tool

village fool

that hurt....

so I tried to convert

my inert

emotions

into potions

maybe lotions

to clear my skin

so I'd fit in

is that a sin?

so I crawled

and I withdrawled

and I bawled....

these "emotions" so called

fuck those, I walled

them up inside

after I cried

I'd hide

and snide

not abide

or be formal

cuz I'll drown if I'm normal

not me

like I used to be

cuz now I'm tough

I've had enough

never again

will I take shit from them

I'll stay to myself

away on a shelf

a stranger in the night

out of sight

out of mind

where no one can find

because life is unkind

so I buried what I used to be

down where no one could see

but deep inside, it's still in me

just waiting for me

to set myself free

because I'll confide

I don't want to hide

never did to begin

now look at the spot I'm in

my patience run thin

my eyes feel dry

no tears left to cry

I feel so alone

and I wait by the phone

to hear that ringtone

but a call never came

so there came my shame

until I lit this damn flame

and it called out my name

and I began to exclaim

"No longer will I hide!

You will hear my side

my hands are not tied

I won't be denied"

what is this new feeling?

MOTHERFUCKER THAT'S PRIDE

revenge at last

to avenge my past

I find

kind

hands

in lands

of snow

my flow

when I go

heelside to toe

on my board

not ignored

crowd roared

never snored

I implored

was that sick?

that slick trick?

that 720 mc

twist

in mist

I kissed

the ground

with no sound

and found

.....peace.....